NOW SERVING#47
YOUR NUMBER#53
EST. WAIT59 min
or·bit·ing
/ˈɔr-bə-tiŋ/ noun & verb, dating slang
- When someone stops talking to you but never quite leaves: they quit replying, yet keep watching your stories, liking your posts, and hovering in your feed like a small moon with nothing to say.
- Staying in someone's orbit. Close enough to be seen. Too far to text.
"He hasn't answered since June, but he viewed my story at 2:13 a.m. Classic orbiting."
Intake form: check all that apply
- Views your story within 4 seconds of posting
- Reacts with a single 🔥 and nothing else
- Goes silent for 6 business days
- Likes a photo of yours from 2019 at 1 a.m.
- Says "we should hang out" and then, structurally, does not
- Remains "typing…" for longer than most marriages
Three or more checks: please take a number. Five or more: please take two.
Treatment options
Our board-uncertified staff recommends one proven procedure. It is free, takes eleven seconds, and almost nobody does it.